Trump to Present America’s Last Line of Defense With Award for Excellence In Journalism

finally real news!

As any true patriot knows, the past five years have been nothing but shameful for the mainstream media.

In what can only be described as a grueling race to be the first to reach the bottom of the barrel, one media organization after another has tried to outdo the other when it comes to reporting fake news.

CNN, ABC, MSNBC, NBC, and countless other fake news organizations are now adorning the media wall of shame.

Even Fox News is now teetering on the brink of the fake news abyss.

Fortunately, a handful of outlets remain true to the facts. And that includes one of the last bastions of fact-laden news you can always trust, America’s Last Line of Defense, also affectionately known by its abbreviation, ALLOD.

Long heralded by former President Trump as a trustworthy news organization, the ALLOD Family of followers includes other conservative luminaries such as the late, great Rush Limbaugh, Dan Bongino, Ted Cruz, Mike Huckabee, Alex Jones, and, of course, Diamond and Silk.

ALLOD articles have been tweeted and retweeted countless of times by some of the most influential conservative voices in America.

In his official statement announcing the award released early this morning, President Trump wrote:

“Melania and I are greatly honored to award America’s Last Line of Defense with the prestigious Wurlitzer Prize for Excellence in Journalisticating (sic).

This award has been long overdue. The ALLOD Family has the most loyal and faithful reporters in the history of this country and has always supported me, your favorite President!

There are no greater MAGA heroes than Joe Barron and Sandy Batt, two star ALLOD reporters who put the fake news media like the failing New York Times to shame.

God bless America and God bless America’s Last Line of Defense!”

Reached at his office at Trump Tower in New York City, managing editor Flagg Eagleton was ecstatic:

“Wow. Just wow. This is an incredible honor.

You have no idea how much this means to us. All of us have worked so diligently to expose the cold, hard truths about President Trump’s years in office.

I promise all Patriotic Americans that we will continue to remain true to our journalistic principles and that we will not be led astray by publishing fake news. Well, maybe a satire article or two, but no fake news, that I can tell you!”

This is a truly heartwarming development for all American Potatriots™.

About Watt A Plonker 20 Articles
Watt A. Plonker is a Wurlitzer Prize winning journalist and author of several books on Potato Farming. His latest book, "The Tantalizing Truth About Taters" was on the New York Times best seller list and was awarded the prestigious Creme de la Menthe prize for Culinary Science Fiction. Mr. Plonker lives in Peckham, South East London with his wife Gladys, who is a nurse with the National Health Service, and his pet hamster Rodney.

Be the first to comment

Leave a Reply