For the first time in German history, that country has given its prestigious Dummkopf Award to a non-German citizen: our dear leader, President Donald J. Trump.
Minister of Important Cultural Awards Oswald Pohl announced the surprising decision to award the Dummkopf to Trump at a press conference in Munich:
“Rarely do we need to look beyond our borders to find someone so deserving of this very important award. But there was absolutely no choice. This year’s Dummkopf has to go to the one who deserves it more than anyone in the world: US President Donald Trump.”
President Trump has already announced that he is incredibly honored and will go to Germany to receive his award.
“I deserve this award more than anyone in the world. Anyone in the universe, really. No one deserves this award more than I do. Believe me,” Trump proudly boasted as he wandered around Melania’s new ghastly Rose Garden, searching unsuccessfully for an actual rose to wear in his lapel as an international award-winning president should do.
Yes, patriots, impeached President Trump is the most qualified person in the world to receive the Dummkopf Award. Previous winners include Hans Frank, who accidentally sliced off his own penis in an unfortunate Oktoberfest accident; Ernst Kaltenbrunner, who challenged German Chancellor Angela Merkel to compete in a science competition at his kid’s elementary school; and Hermann Göring, who was too much of a pussy to face his trial and swallowed cyanide instead.
World-famous historian Sandy Batt chuckled when asked about the shocking news that the Germans had awarded the Dummkopf to Trump this year.
“I’m sure Trump is too stupid to run ‘Dummkopf’ through Google translate, so it’s no wonder he’s bragging about it. It means ‘stupid person’ or ‘fool,’ and watching him waddle up on the stage to receive it will be one of the most hilarious moments of my life.”
Don’t be a dummkopf. Don’t vote for Trump.