AOC: Melania is a Low Class, ‘Kidney’ Sagging, Has-Been Escort

trump: aoc should be expelled from congress

While on vacation in her native New York City, outspoken congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez dropped in on noted shock jock Howard Stern’s daily radio show.

It did not go well.

During a segment in which the two highlighted the plight of sex workers in New York City during the pandemic, Ms. Ocasio-Cortez suddenly and inexplicably switched the topic of discussion to the First Lady, Melania Trump.

A transcribed excerpt of the dialog in question is below:

Stern: “So getting back to your days as a bartender, did you have many interactions with sex workers?”

AOC: “Absolutely. On a daily basis, in fact. Many of them were my best customers. They would often meet their dates in my bar, or just stop by for a drink after work. Every single one of them was a classy lady. Nothing like that low-class, ‘kidney’ sagging, has-been escort Melania.”

Stern: “Wow. Those are some harsh words for the First Lady.”

AOC: “Nothing is harsh enough for that gold digging, Botox soaked, BackPage reject. She literally screwed her way to the White House. And now that she’s in the White House, she’s gone from screwing old men to screwing the taxpayer.”

Stern: “OK. So, back to the sex workers in New York City…”

AOC: “She WAS a sex worker in New York City! And a lousy one at that. You should have heard what the other sex workers had to say about her. Even they were disgusted at the things she was willing to do to get ahead. And if anyone should know what disgusting is, it’s a sex worker.”

Stern: “And on that note, we’ll be right back after these messages from our sponsors.”

Asked for comment, Melania Trump spokeswoman Sandy Batt adamantly defended the First Lady:

“Ms. Ocasio-Cortez has some nerve talking like that about Melania Trump. Mrs. Trump was an excellent escort. She has some of the best ‘kidneys‘ in the business. Her list of clientele was the envy of New York City.  Ms. Ocasio-Cortez is only jealous that she herself wasn’t a centerfold in GQ Magazine. That horse face wouldn’t make it to the cover of Mad Magazine.”

And that, my fellow Potatriots, feels like a good place to end.

About Watt A Plonker 17 Articles
Watt A. Plonker is a Wurlitzer Prize winning journalist and author of several books on Potato Farming. His latest book, "The Tantalizing Truth About Taters" was on the New York Times best seller list and was awarded the prestigious Creme de la Menthe prize for Culinary Science Fiction. Mr. Plonker lives in Peckham, South East London with his wife Gladys, who is a nurse with the National Health Service, and his pet hamster Rodney.

2 Comments

  1. YOU NEED TO SHUT YOUR MOUTH !!!! THE FIRST LADY HAS CLASS AND BEAUTY AND YOU CAN NEVER HAVE THOSE, YOU ARE JEALOUS HATER, GO BACK TO THE BAR. NO BODY KNOWS HOW YOU GOT INTO GOVERNMENT, PROBABLY SLEPT YOUR WAY TO THE TOP WITH OBAMA. WE KNOW YOU ARE A MUSLIM.

  2. SHE WILL NOT LEAVE IT, SHE CAN SPEAK ONE LANGUAGE AND NOT VERY WELL, MELANIA SPEAKS 7 LANGUAGES, SHE CAME TO AMERICA ON AN EINSTEIN VISA. THAT IS ONLY GIVEN TO THE TOP PEOPLE. AND SHE IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL NATURAL WOMAN EVER. SHE IS KIND, SHE LOVES CHILDREN, AND IS A CHRISTIAN NOT A MUSLIM.

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