Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is a lot of things: stunningly beautiful, intelligent, compassionate, and hopefully my future ex-wife. She’s accomplished quite a bit in her short career. It’s impressive and infuriating for folks who have lived thrice as long and have accomplished very little.
Looking at you, the entire state of Florida.
For all of her strengths, however, she does have her faults. Clearly indoctrinated in the liberal and socialistic ideals of George Soros (take a drink!), she’s very much a liberal. As we all know, liberals as intensely vain. Well, that vainness is about to catch up with her.
With much hoopla, it has been suggested and then submitted a Senate bill to have Ms. Ocasio-Cortez’s face plastered over the face of Lady Liberty’s.
She graciously has accepted this nomination. In her own words:
“I stand for liberty and freedom more than that old French bag ever has.”
Needless to say, this started quite the commotion amongst her supporters and opposers alike. We reached out to her main opponent, local man Rusty Shackleford, who issued the following statement:
“SHE TOOK OUR JOBS! But seriously, why would I want to look at her gorgeous face every single time I stare at the statue? What in the heck does a woman of color who’s done more in her life than I have have to do with America?
As a Trump supporter, I vehemently oppose this. And yes, I just had to read ‘vehemently’ of a cue card, as I don’t know what that words means and until five seconds ago, didn’t even know that was a word.”
Asinine ramblings aside, the idea is still fresh and the accompanying bill for the facelift hits the Senate floor later this week. Will it pass? Probably not, as our entire Senate is insanely racist and incredibly shortsighted.
I, for one, applaud the chutzpah of this young lady. Personally, I’m more of an Ihlan Omar fan, but you’ll take what you get.
As my Grandpa Pulcepper always said, “You might not bake the cake, but you damn as sure slap it off the table.”
I still don’t know what that means, but it seemed appropriate.