In yet another slap in the face to The United States of America, supermodel Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has authorized the use funds from the Canadians Repelling Americans Plan, or CRAP for short, to build a giant snow wall that will span their entire southern border.
All 3,987 miles of it. Because Canada is afraid of loyal Trump supporters bringing a little freedom to their oppressed resources.
Of course, the United States knows better. Canadians are coming across the border to escape their socialist health care and to gain opportunity in the country with the best economy in the history of the world and Trudeau doesn’t want them to leave.
Sandy Batt, of our sister network Canada’s Fourth Line Forecheckers, interviewed the lead engineer of CRAP, Gerald Kamloopsky. He said:
“We started this CRAP in 2016, immediately after those idiots elected Donald Trump to be their President. It started off with a kid named Shane who donated his allowance to the local Mounties because he was afraid that the country would be overrun by Americans. It exploded from there.
We have a high spirit of cooperation up here in Canada. Since this is a socialist country and people aren’t used to getting to keep any of their money because of our tax rates, we were able to convince them to work for us to build the wall. All we think about is pushing the CRAP out during breakfast, lunch, and supper. We’re gonna make this CRAP happen, eh!”
The official account says that once Justin Trudeau learned how scared little Shane was, he rallied Parliament to unanimously pass the CRAP and began to appropriate Canadian tax dollars toward this vanity project. Since their taxes are so high, they pretty much already had the money and just needed to move it over to pay for that CRAP. Plus snow is free and they always have a lot of it.
Sandy Batt was unable to interview Shane probably because he doesn’t exist and was created as a fear-mongering tool to trick Canada into doing the evil leftist Prime Minister’s bidding. Much as Mexico is paying to secure our southern border, Canada is paying to secure our northern border. Once again, the mere presence of Donald Trump has helped to keep America safe!