By Teresa Nelson with Fallis Gunnington
The Democrat’s dog and pony impeachment show has taken it’s toll on the first lady Melania Trump and Ivanka’s son Barron. With jackals like MSNBC, CNN, Vanity Fair, Rolling Stone, Big Juggs Quarterly, and the BBC hounding them both day and night, hoping to find some insight on the President’s true mindset, the pair have decided to take a “vacation” from the atmosphere to Mrs. Trump’s home country of Slovenia.
The First lady’s family beet farm lays about 20 miles from the western border, where Melania once grew up harvesting fields for sale and borscht, creating dolls for her playmates out of discarded sheep wool and field mouse corpses, and eventually plying a respectable whoring career within the region. Long-time farm hand Sven Hosesack, known locally as : “The Bulge”, both for his ability to harvest large sacks full of produce as well as prowess with his gargantuan penis, gave some details:
“Mellie and the boy, they are staying in the old upstairs room where grandmother once make creams and waters to heal goats from beetle fever and make cows not give urine milk. Is good room. Now is color TV, shag carpet, and still secret floor tile so can sneak in for make Kashumpkees without Secret Service man to hear. Mellie in old days very famous for Kashumpkee. Is good talent for woman with face like fish.”
At this time, no return date information has been released for the two presidential family icons, but Barron’s next term at the Mayonnaise Academy for Privileged Caucasians begins in mid-February.