AMC, long thought to be defunct, has reappeared and are suing the federal government. Their complaint seems ludicrous but they are pressing ahead nonetheless. The American Masalaman Council is demanding that all public school classrooms in the USA have desks arranged so that students face the Holy Land and they are intent enough on this to have hired a massive team of the nation’s finest legal minds to launch and see to the lawsuit.
Johamma Baronna, their chief attorney, explained why this “should not be seen as silly or frivolous but rather as a benefit to all students attending public schools”:
“It is widely known within the Masalaman culture that the ability to learn is amplified when the holy land is placed in front of them. The energy from that land transfers itself into their minds through their noses, these being the most conducive to energy reception. This is established science.
So obviously, this arrangement would make for a better learning environment for all children, not just the Masalamen. This organization is looking out for every child. Why would we oppose a stronger education for our young?”
If that sounds like hocus-pocus mumbo-jumbo voodoo to you, it’s because it is. This is not science. This is nonsense and we won’t have it here.