Oregon Father Gives 4-Year Old Son Bernie Sanders Tattoo


The Plimpton family in Kuminfaze, Oregon are all diehard fans of Democratic candidate Bernie Sanders.  Lillian Plimpton went door-to-door during his first campaign for the Presidency, and she and her husband Daniel donated generously, their salaries from operating a commercial clammery providing proud assistance to the socialist pol.  But now they’ve taken what some feel is a step too much – they’ve given their four-year old son Orville a Bernie Sanders tattoo.

Could’ve been worse. Like his brother, Wilbur.

Daniel assures his critics that the boy was all for the permanent skin marking :

“His first word ever was ‘Bernie’.  Not mama or papa.  Bernie.  Since then, he has us read to him from the Bernie or Bust website every day.  He has posters, pictures, little toys that we’ve sculpted to have Bernie heads on.  A tattoo was just the next natural progression of his respect for a great man.  His classmates at school think it’s awesome.”

* Hypocritical mansions not included.

The Plimptons admit there may be a few toxicological problems with giving a four-year old a tattoo, but are confident that their son has what it takes to persevere.

“As he grows, so will the tattoo.  And when Bernie is the President of the United States, he’ll be the proudest kid in America.”