Elijah Cummings’ District Overtakes Chicago As US Crime Capital

The truth is right in front of you

President Trump called the area Elijah Cummings represents a “disgusting pit of human despair” and “a sad statement of life on America” – eloquent words to describe the Maryland district that is so infested with criminals that the latest DOJ crime data has dubbed it “America’s New Crime Capital.”

The DOJ released their new figures immediately after President Trump’s assessment of Baltimore. That they hadn’t yet accumulated any crime statistics from any parts of the country was irrelevant. That the DOJ doesn’t compile such data ever, also not an issue. The report came on official Department of Justice stationary with the stamp and signature of the Attorney General on it so it was automatically the word of the United States Government.

Included in the detailed figures are an invented per capita homicide rate, an imaginary dollar figure of property theft, and fictitious numbers of a variety of other felonies and misdemeanours. In each instance, the Maryland region comes out on top by huge margins.

Elijah Cummings had this to say:

“Bull Motherexpletiving Expletive”

Then he went on:

“Those aren’t statistics! They’re randomly generated numbers. It says we had 500 billion homicides last year. Who in their right mind, other than our idiot president, would believe that?”

Just stop, Elijah. Accept that your district is a war zone. You’re just making a fool of yourself.

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